Disasters in Detention
by Red Witch
Summary: Detention insanity with the typical cast of characters.


****

I don't own X-Men characters. Well "Shadowdance" was great! Loved it! Not only were there wonderful Brotherhood moments, Lance and Kitty sappiness, but Jean got her just deserts! So I guess I will make this story both a sequel to "Lunatics in the Library" and as a bridge for "Shadowdance!" Question: What happened to Freddy's hair? It looks like it was burned off. Must have been during those two episodes that were skipped! And I guess Tabitha must have had a falling out with Kurt…Hmmm…That gives me ideas. But for now, this nonsense!

**Disasters in Detention**

"Well it seems like nearly the whole gang is here in detention again," Todd smirked.

"Yes, too bad Lance couldn't join us," Fred remarked. "But we have some wonderful new friends to play with!"

"Shut up Fred," Jean folded her arms. 

"This is all your fault you know," Scott groaned. 

"Pietro I am gonna kill you!" Evan snarled.

"Don't you dare lay a finger on Pietro!" A pretty brunette snapped. She and three other girls surrounded Pietro, admiring him.

"Yeah there's no guy as romantic as him!" A blonde girl giggled.

"How did all these girls end up in detention?" Jean looked around.

"Simple," Pietro smirked. "They knew I'd be here." He turned his attention back to the quartet of female admirers. "Ladies, I truly appreciate you coming here, even though it wasn't necessary!"

"Anything for you Pietro!" A brunette chirped.

"We think that rotten Mr. Sherman was totally bogus!" The blonde snapped. "I mean Principal Kelly didn't care if you sang on the intercom! Why should he? So you interrupted his class! It's not like anyone pays attention to him anyway!" 

"We couldn't leave you alone," Another girl cooed. "Would you like some soda sweetie?"

"Oh I think I'm gonna be sick," Evan grumbled. 

"Why am I here?" Risty looked around. "How does this keep happening to me?" 

"I can't believe Lance isn't here," Scott grumbled. 

"Hello! He didn't start any fights in the library!" Tabitha said. 

"We didn't start any fights!" Jean snapped.

"That's not what I heard," Tabitha snickered.

"I wouldn't talk!" Jean snapped. "Those rumors probably came from a troublemaker like you."

"Hey I'm only telling the truth Miss High and Mighty!" Tabitha snapped. 

"Will you two keep it down?" Scott hissed. "You're gonna get us all in trouble!"

"We're already in trouble," Todd told him. 

By now Jean and Tabitha were giving death glares at each other. "What's the matter Red?" Tabitha smirked. "Afraid what people will think now that you've been in detention with us delinquents? It must be so hard for you, worrying about your perfect record being smashed to bits!"

"Hey this detention's not too bad today," Risty snickered. 

"Now I want a good clean fight!" Fred grinned. "No hitting below the belt!"

"Nobody is gonna fight anybody!" Scott snapped. "Jean just ignore her!"

"You're right," Jean turned around in her seat. "I'm not going to stoop to her level!"

"Awww," Tabitha drawled. "Miss Goodie Good thinks I'm not good enough to get in a fight with her huh?" 

"Oh this is gonna be good," Todd snickered. 

"Ladies I think we should get out of the line of fire," Pietro stood up with his admirers. "This isn't going to be pretty. Perhaps we should adjourn to another room where we can serve our sentence in more peaceful surroundings."

"Oh can't we stay Pietro," One girl pouted. "I wanna see Jean get it!"

"Yeah!" The blonde said. "Nobody really likes her!"

"What?" Jean snapped. 

"The truth hurts don't it Red?" Tabitha smiled. "Nobody likes a girl who strings along guys!"

"Coming from a girl like you that's hardly an insult!" Jean snapped.

"This is not good," Scott groaned. 

"Hey I may do a little harmless flirting," Tabitha said. "But I never ever purposely flirt so that two guys fight over me! Unlike you I don't need to inflate my ego that way." 

"Why you little…" Jean snapped.

"Will you knock it off Tabitha?" Scott shouted. "Can't any of your control her?" 

"Control?" Pietro raised an eyebrow. "Tabitha's a person. Last thing I checked there was a little something called free will. I realize that that's a difficult concept for you Geeks but do try to pay attention will you?" 

"ZING!" Fred chuckled. 

"I will not stoop to their level," Jean muttered to herself. "I will not stoop to their level."

"Oh yes Jean just ignore them," Risty said. "So what if the whole school is talking about your relationships? So what if the entire school thinks that you're in love with Scott and you're just using Duncan as a ploy? Ignore them." 

"I am not using Duncan!" Jean snapped.

"Oh I didn't know you really liked him," Risty smirked. "My mistake."

"Um…" Jean turned red. Scott turned away. 

Mr. Sherman, the evil teacher who was currently loathed by half the student body stormed in. "Okay!" He shouted pointing to his hair, which was purple, and in spikes. "Which one of you did this?"

"I cannot tell a lie," Todd raised his hand. "Jean did it!"

"What?" Jean shouted. "I did not!"

"Nice try loser," Mr. Sherman snarled. "I know one of you delinquents did it! I am warning you now, I am not going to tolerate any more nonsense!" 

That was when a chicken wandered into the room. 

"Where did this chicken come from?" Mr. Sherman shouted.

"An egg duh," Fred rolled his eyes. 

"I'd accuse you of being a smart mouth if I didn't know how stupid you were!" Mr. Sherman snapped. 

"Maybe they came in that car filled with chickens," Todd pointed out the window.

"What? WHAT?" Mr. Sherman screamed. "MY CAR! MY CAR! AGGGH!" He ran outside screaming. 

"Shall I detonate the shaving cream bomb now?" Fred asked, taking out a remote control from his backpack. 

"Nah," Todd shook his head. "Wait until he actually gets in the car." 

Meanwhile Pietro had somehow sneaked in a tablecloth and candles. "Sparkling cider anyone?" He asked pouring each girl a glass. "Don't worry, it's non-alcoholic."

"I do not believe this," Evan groaned, banging his head against the desk as the girls cooed over Pietro. 

"You people are nuts," Scott looked at them. 

"Here chick, chick, chick, chick…" Tabitha cooed to the chicken. "Come on chickie…Come on…"

"OW!" Jean screeched.

"No no, don't peck at Jean's leg," Tabitha said. "You might get germs."

"Target is now in the vehicle and is being pecked," Todd looked through binoculars. "Ready…aim…fire!"

Fred pressed a button and there was a loud explosion outside. "Oh I see you went with the green dye this time," Fred nodded. "Nice touch." 

"Will somebody get this stupid bird away from me?" Jean shouted. "Shoo! Go away! Shoo!" 

"Anybody want a scone?" Pietro took out a picnic basket. 

"I do!" Todd raised his hand. Pietro began tossing scones around.

"Oy!" Risty whistled. "Toss me one of them too!"

"For you lovely lady I will personally hand deliver it to you," Pietro got up and handed one to Risty on a napkin. "And one for you too Tabby."

"Where do you people get this stuff?" Scott asked. "The National Psychotic's Association Catalog? I mean how…? Where did you get…? Oh never mind!"

"Well on to cheerful topics," Risty munched. "Did you all hear about the Sadie Hawkins Dance? Sounds like a lot of fun."

"Yeah who are you gonna ask Jeanie?" Tabitha asked. 

"None of your business," Jean snapped. 

"Duncan," Todd, Tabitha and Fred said at the same time.

"I didn't say that!" Jean shouted.

"Okay I got five bucks she goes with Duncan," Todd went to the blackboard and started to make a betting chart.

"Two bucks on Scott!" Risty shouted.

"Stop betting on us!" Scott shouted.

"AGGGGH!" Jean ran out of the room.

"Wonder what's wrong with her?" Todd scratched his head. 


End file.
